I got off the plane in Austin, Texas around 7pm local time. It was dark, cold, and I couldn’t be happier to be on solid ground. The flight to Texas was probably the second worst flight I’ve ever been on (the first one being a helicopter during a storm that was later reported to me as having taken small arms fire in the jungles of the Philippines.) So, this was the worst commercial airline flight I have been on. The turbulence sent us falling into each other laps, kept the drink service cart from giving me any booze for over 2 hours, and by the time they did a speed lap throwing cans left and right they gave me a few bottles of whiskey with an apologetic look and a kind “no charge.” It was a smooth landing, and that was the best part of the whole ordeal.
I rented a Nisan Sentra, black, from the rows of available cars and headed towards the Hilton Garden Inn Austin North. It was less elegant than the overly auspicious HGI in San Diego, but all in all cleaner, more corporate. The room was nice. The location was decent, but those highways and frontage roads were a nightmare. Even just getting to the other side of the freeway was an ordeal. The strangest thing about it was the crows. So many black birds, like a Hitchcock film. There had to be at least 20,000 of them. They covered the power lines, the bridges, everywhere. When they took flight they would black out the sky. All in all, it felt rather ominous.
I needed to eat. On a whim I chose Dim Sum. I found a small strip mall that was full of Asian establishments. Korean, Thai, Sushi, Ramen, Everything you could imagine but I was all about the dumpling. The food was so good I could not stop eating, I went home so full I was in actual pain. The restaurant was called New Fortune, but my cookie at the end ironically, did not have one. I hoped that wasn’t an omen.
Another place I loved was Velvet Taco. It was out of this world. So many different flavor combinations. They had breakfast tacos with eggs and tots. They had chicken and waffle. Cheesesteak Tacos. Buffalo Chicken Tacos. Cubano tacos with some of the best pickles I’ve ever tasted. You name it, they got it. Now I have to hope this doesn’t looks suspect on the expense report. Yikes.
Since Texas is known for the best BBQ in the nation and great Steak houses, not to mention the weird hipster bars in Austin, there’s so much going on I decided to explore a different place each night. Paul Martin’s one night for an amazing mushroom soup and braised short ribs. Brotherton’s BBQ for the best ribs I’ve ever eaten. Hell, I even had their smoked turkey (and I hate turkey) but I would order that anytime. Easy Tiger Bakery had brews, brats and large pretzels for that always Oktoberfest feeling.
Easy Tiger was definitely one of those “weird” places in Austin. I tried a sour pale ale- Blue Owl Spirit Animal- that really won me over. Since it was a bakery and the smell of beer and yeast was already in the air, I ordered some baked goods (pretzel and baguette) it was way too much. I asked the guy next to me, who looked like a young John Hodgman, if he wanted to split it… I wasn’t gonna be able to finish it. He declined and moved away from me appalled I had the audacity to speak aloud towards him… maybe he was John Hodgman.
The last place I had to go was Culinary Dropout. It was heralded as an amazing eatery so I headed that way my last night in town. I heard a live band rocking out, so I peaked my head around the corner to see them, and it was one guy. He was using a simple Helix setup with a single guitar and some pedals, but he sounded like a 4 piece group… I was impressed. I couldn’t find a seat at the bar, too crowded. 8 people were sharing 4 seats, so I went outside and the tables were overflowing. Almost everyone was playing ping pong, or some other crazy game they had outside. I quickly realized this wasn’t a “solo” place.
I decided to go for a walk. Check out the strange bars and stores around the area (called The Domain.) One strange store went by the name b8ta (beta) and the dude there explained their business model to me. They don’t make any money on the things they sell there. They just rent shelf space to companies who want to get their unique products out to an audience. Fun drones, Travel Guitars, GPS enable wallets, electronic pens, e ink typewriters and other things you never realized you never needed.
On my way back to the car I stopped into Culinary Dropout, found a seat at the bar, grabbed a drink, and listened awkwardly to the Tinder date next to me. A guy in his late 40s had quit his job, sold everything and moved here to Austin. He was bragging about something or another to his date, who was quickly chewing her salad and drinking her wine. Either trying to move this on to the bedroom (he was a decent looking dude) or she realized he was full of shit and she was too old for dead end guys. Either way I realized I was having a dead end night, and I had a plane to catch in the morning.
Hotel: https://www.hilton.com/en/hotels/ausangi-hilton-garden-inn-austin-north/
Car: https://www.hilton.com/en/hotels/ausangi-hilton-garden-inn-austin-north/
Restaurants:
New Fortune: https://www.newfortunetx.com/
Velvet Taco: https://velvettaco.com/
Brotherton’s BBQ: https://www.pftxbbq.com/#home-section
Paul Martin’s: https://paulmartinsamericangrill.com/locations/austin-restaurant/
Culinary Dropout: https://www.culinarydropout.com/locations/austin-tx/
Company Card Confidential 